You are not special.

You are not special.

I am not special.

Webster's defines the word Special as "different from what is normal or usual; especially : unusual in a good way : better or more important than others."

Seriously, from that definition are any of us really special? Do we even want to be? Usually the term is thrown around to build self-esteem but I don't know if it's better to think that I'm better or more important than others.

I think we need to maybe refrain from using words beyond their intended meanings. I'm not special. I may have a special outlook on the world, but I, myself, am not special.

Of course, the phrase could also be used to teach kids to respect one another I guess. If I'm special, the reasoning may go, then everyone is special and I should treat them as such. This is a load of hooey to me. You want to teach a kid to be arrogant and self-serving as a way to teach them to get along?

No, teach kids that they aren't special, that they aren't better, and that they are not deserving of special treatment. Then teach them to treat others how they would want to be treated. It's different when you think you don't deserve it. For one thing, you aren't offended when someone else fails to treat you as you treated them.  

I think a better word to build a child's self-esteem is "unique." They are unique. There is no one else on the planet with the same outlook, thoughts and feelings. Oh they may be similar, but not exact.

We are all unique.

In the future let's not use the word special when we really mean unique.

Playing with toys

Haven't posted anything in awhile as I've been rather busy. I haven't taken the time to really do anything fun, this blog included. I started thinking about relaxation and how people do many different things to relax. Some, read, some watch tv or movies. Others go visit friends or play sports. Some play games.

I started thinking of my boys. They are 10 and 13 and are typical for a kid in the US. They play video games. All the time. ALL the time. I play video games, so I'm not against them. In fact, the games they play are my games. My only concern is that is all they do. When they do go outside it is to ride their bikes or something and that's fine too. The problem I have is that they do not know how to play.

I gave my youngest all my old GI Joes and told him I'd play with him. He asked me "how?" I was taken aback. How? He simply did not know how to play with toys. I'm seeing a trend develop in toy play. Either kids are predominately playing video games or they are playing with building toys like LEGOs. My boys love LEGOs. I know that if I get them some of those they will enjoy them. Watching them play though I noticed a trend. After they construct the toy they just leave it. The fun part is over for them. To them, the point is to build the toy and once that is accomplished it has no further purpose.

This is a problem to me. To me, play is vitally important to the growth of imagination and intelligence. It's a form of mental exercise. Instead we have a (largely) dictated play style imposed on our kids. "Go here, do this" mission parameters with fully realized graphics do not allow kids to use any imagination. Toys are no longer selling like they used to. Kids now want tablets and video games and while that is good, I think kids are missing out on a vital part of development. It doesn't take effort to play a little. A child playing with toys with a simple story based on his or her favorite movie is far more imaginative than sitting down and playing a pre-written game.

I'm not against games though. I just don't want to see children go without what I think is a vital part of their development. Parents today should think about that and encourage their children to put down the controller and pick up an action figure.

No place for grown-ups.

I have been a denizen of the Internet for over 15 years. I used netscape navigator and remember MIDI music and webrings and IRC.  The internet has changed a great deal in terms of technological innovation and application. It is eclipsing traditional social and commercial norms. Internet culture pervades popular culture and is ubiquitous. But while the internet can be a useful tool for acquiring knowledge and bettering oneself, I think it's easy to assume that these lofty goals are not what the majority of users come for.

This is no place for grown-ups. It is no place for Adults, the mature, or the wise. The internet is a place where everyone has a voice, but often that voice is ignorant, foolish, and downright stupid. Most humor on the internet can be thought of as either babyish "cat" humor, drunken frat boy logic, or shallow sex jokes. The internet (and by that I mean the larger population of users) seems to think that making a tired joke about breasts or inserting expletives automatically makes something funnier.  I used to read humor articles at Cracked.com. I found them funny if a little silly. In the past year I have found a downturn in quality as they have allowed freelance writers to post articles. They are terrible. Inserting swears in an article does increase shock value but that doesn't really make it funny. It's lazy.

The internet is the realm of the child, the sullen teen, and the idiot frat boy. Anonymity has produced a group of people who feel mighty but who instead reveal themselves to be small minded. For every intelligent article I've read, I've had to wade through a sea of uninformed opinion. We are championing peoples opinions as if everyone contributes something but they don't. Everyone does have a right to an opinion, but only an informed opinion. They aren't allowed to be stupid and not called out on it.

As content is further and further mired in the mud of the lowest common denominator. we can expect to see more base and juvenile humor, opinions, and behavior. It is the way of things I guess. When you open the door to the public you get the dumb with the smart, and the dumb generally outnumbers the smart.

This is why the internet is no place for manners. It is a playground for children, both in the physical and mental sense. The reasonable, the intelligent, and the socially mature have little real voice or say. They are drowned out by the clacking drone of the simple.

There are only two ways to really combat this unfortunate reality: To give in and become one of the mewling dullards or to carry on as one of the few voices in a sea of brash mediocrity.

Which would you choose?

What is in a name?

What's in a name? that which we call a rose

By any other name would smell as sweet? 

-Romeo & Juliet, ACT II Scene 2

A name is very important and changing the name of something changes the thing. Oh I know someone would say that is silly but this about how "re-branding" something can change how something means to us.


For example: The Opossum, or 'Possum.



A nasty, diseased pest, known as a roadkill delicacy in the more rural areas of the country.




Now, behold, The North American White-Faced Pouch-Cat.



A vibrant edition to the local ecosystem that should be preserved and respected.

Even though it's wrong, calling something by a different name has this affect. Think about people who are "pro-life". Well of course you are! Who isnt?? No, what they mean is they are "anti-abortion." However, "anti" has negative connotations. The same is with "progressives." So those that disagree with you are ultimately backwards? That is quite an assumption. Businesses that "downsize" are really just firing people and those that are "proactive" are...actually I'm not sure. They are "in favor of being active?" What's that even mean??

You are being deceived.

Anyone who knows me, knows I do not like disingenuous people or advertisements. I think it comes from my background with psychology. I don't like being manipulated and I don't like it when people sell me things without being honest about it. Tell what you want to tell me. Don't suddenly call me up to see how I am doing only to ask for a favor. Needing a favor is fine, don't pretend to be my friend first. As annoying as this is with people you may know, it is far worse and unforgivable when advertisements and corporations do this.

You are being deceived. Whenever you turn on the TV you are being deceived. Lied to? Not necessarily although there is not much preventing companies from doing that. No, instead you are being misled, or rather deceived. I have to laugh whenever I see items in Hot Topic about non-conformity or people "trying to go their own way". We are easily led beasts, we humans. It is easy to make us believe that we have to buy something or that we think a certain way.

I watched a cute commercial yesterday about a family making do during a power outage. They gathered the children together and grabbed flashlights and told stories and all had a great time. Snack time was apparently the Dannon yogurt in the fridge. Perhaps they thought they had to eat it so it would not go bad, or perhaps it is a easy snack to have without power. The family eats for perhaps 2 seconds of this 15 second ad. The power is restored but they turn off the lights because they are having a good family time. Now, how is this ad meant to sell the item? The yogurt is only featured briefly. Are they saying that we should have yogurt on hand in case of a power outage? I'd doubt it. No, the idea is that they are showing you a wonderful family time and, oh! look, Dannon yogurt played a part. What should be the conscious of unconscious reaction to this? That, so my family could for one night, just one night, behave like we know each other, I should buy some Dannon yogurt? That is a pretty ridiculous reason, yet that is exactly how you are meant to think. Oh, perhaps not consciously, but subconsciously.

I never take anyone seriously when they rant about corporations and carry Apple products or drive a Volvo and I find it worse when these companies use that elitist non-conformity to sell their products. Apple is a terrible offender. They make the argument that people who use their product "think different" -ly from people who do not. Obviously if you want to be one of the intelligent people you should use Apple products. This was of inclusion and exclusion works with products and political ideas. Why do you think we use the term "progressive" instead of "liberal" these days?

You are being deceived. You are being manipulated and coerced on a constant basis. Only when we realize how we are being sold something can we really be free to make our own choices.

Don't be a victim.

No, I am not posting about a particular problem that people could fall prey to. No, this post is about the growing cult of the victim.

American's have always liked the little guy. They love the idea of the scrappy underdog beating the big monster. That is why all of our history plays off of that. We are the nation that pulled ourselves from our bootstraps and fought off the big dogs...rather than the economic and industrious powerhouse whose rise was inevitable due to resources and population.

Now, please note that I don't mean people should not be proud to champion through despite being a victim. Those people are strong and do not have this mentality. I mean the people who eagerly gobble up another chance to be looked on with pity and and attention.

I actually know people that get excited when diagnosed with a simple problem. They will go on and on about it. They like the attention, I get that, but they also seem dedicated to placing themselves in any little demographic that will afford them the chance to feel "oppressed."

To all those people who feel the need to play the constant victim, please stop. Realize that strength comes from refusing to be a victim. Victims who have risen above the terrible things that have happened to them show strength. Those that do not, show weakness and dependence. I can't really respect either.

I think Dr. Ben Carson pretty much says what I think.


Side rant: Please don't act superior to a whole group of people, when you, yourself have many of those attitudes. Please people, make sure you are not a hypocrite. It's not ok.

A Brainstorm and a Rewind

This is going to be a short one.

So I am catching up on my Transformers comic reading. It is an understatement to say I am a Transformers fan. Anyway, been reading the Transformers: More Than Meets The Eye series and it is my favorite comic so far. Really great characters and a few surprises. For one thing, there is a relationship between  two bots that is really interesting. It's important to note that Transformers are sexless. I mean, they are robots. They reproduce through some strange ways, but none of those ways are sexual in nature. They do have gender but it seems to be a stylistic choice more than anything. In MTMTE Chromedome and Rewind clearly have a relationship...and they both identify themselves with male pronouns.

I wont talk about this in any detail because I'd encourage anyone to pick up those books and read them but...yep. Think about it.

You know what I think? I think it is the absolutely best example of how love can possibly be. These characters are robots. There is no sex, no attraction, no need to procreate or need for pleasure. There is only simple affection.

So what is my point? The authors have illustrated a homosexual relationship as being nothing more than two people in love. Why can't other media do that? There were no 'gay' jokes. There was no campy attitudes or tongue-in-cheeks references. Nor were there any thinly veiled allusions. It was presented as is and it was beautiful.

I'm not one to jump on a bandwagon. I'm pretty disgusted by how new causes are adopted and dropped. I've never been against gay people or homosexual marriage, but I've never really been their champion either. I have never liked how the gay lifestyle has been presented. The in-your-face sexuality and hedonism that is presented has always given me pause. So I've been tolerant, but never accepting.

But you know, I think that's the media. I don't think I've ever seen a gay person that wasn't campy or an over the top stereotype. In MTMTE a similar relation was presented without all of that. It was presented just as it was. There was no big sign pointing to it screaming "LOOK!! TEH GAYS!" It was presented seriously and wonderfully and because of it, my eyes are open more than before.

A change

I have not posted anything in my blog for quite a while. This is in spite of my need to constantly complain about things that I see. The problem I found was that I tried to follow a theme. That was a mistake. I generally have a lot to say but when I confine myself, I grow stagnant.


Now, with this blog, I will just write about whatever I feel like. You may like what I write about, or (more likely) you will not.  I have always been a bit of a devil's advocate, as I believe that true understanding only comes when you can see multiple sides and points of view. This means that I will post things that I may believe in, but not strongly or at all. None of my posts are here to change opinion. Most people only want validation of their own beliefs and have no lust for truth. This is fine. Go elsewhere.

For the rest, welcome.